Allie’s Friday Penance Post of the Week! What have they done to the Magnificat?!?!


Well, everybody, it’s Friday and if you have any familiarity with Holy Mother Church and her beautiful traditions/Tradition, you know that Friday is reserved as a day of penance (Lent or not) unless it is a solemnity, then it is not applicable.

I have decided that along with the traditional acts and penances of Fridays including abstinence from meat and making a Way of the Cross, I shall share one penance with you all that I find particularly painful: inclusive language.

Now, before I get into a rant about inclusive language and how it’s a whole lotta something about a whole lotta nothing really that important, I will just cut to the chase:

Since I went to an uber-inclusive Catholi/yc college that just so happens to also have an AMAZING Theology department, I was exposed to this travesty against revelation and the Church that is inclusive language.

Making it my personal mission to expunge any bits of the malarcky I could, I combed the free book racks of the library that were almost CONSTANTLY filled with garbage by such heretics as Joan Chittiser (or however you spell her name) also known as Chitty-Chitty-Bang-Bang in some circles of AQ and her crew of Deceivers.

One piece of fool’s gold I found is the book “Psalms Anew” written by two Franciscan sisters (a giant smear on the good name of the order of Holy Father Francis and Holy Mother Clare) who are probably now ex-nuns and members of NARAL and lay “empowerers” of the LCWR which everyone knows is the acronym for the “Leadership Conference of WACKY-KOOKOO Religious.” Irony: “Conference” comes from the French confrere which is something to the tune of co-brothers … THAT EXPLAINS A LOT!!!

Anywho, my friends and I would made it a custom of reading from this piece of heretical blasphemy whenever we were either too happy for a Friday or we needed a good laugh at the expense of some poorly misguided women.

Therefore, in order to perpetuate and proliferate this wholly edifying custom of dissing inclusive language for the codswallop it is, I shall share entries from it with you . After I post the excerpt from the book, I will post a MUCH better translation of the text probably drawing from the NAB which while it has it’s own flaws, is somewhat better/much better than this stuff. If I find a better translation, I will post it and cite it.

To give you all an idea of what we are dealing with here, I shall start with their HORRIBLY mangled version of the Magnificat (Canticle of Our Lady) that is TRADITIONALLY prayed in the Divine Office at Vespers/Evening Prayer in the Church.

“My being proclaims your greatness,
and my spirit finds joy in you, my Savior.

For you have looked upon me your servant, in my lowliness,
all ages to come shall call me blessed.

God, you who are mighty, have done great things for me.
Holy is your name.

Your mercy is from age to age toward those who fear you.

You have shown might with your arm
and confused the proud in their inmost thoughts.

You have deposed the mighty from their thrones
and raised the lowly to high places.

The hungry you have given every good thing
while the rich you have sent away empty.

You have upheld Israel your servant, ever mindful of your mercy

even as you promised our ancestors;
promised Abraham, Sarah, and their descendants forever. (Don’t you love how they need to include Sarah as if the redemptive purpose of the Incarnation was EXCLUSIVELY for men?  Why can’t it just be inferred?  Are these people that dense to need it spelled out for them?  Come on!)

(Now the Glory Be that follows it in Vespers)

Glory be to God our Creator, (Let’s not be utilitarian in our phraseology for God at all.  The FATHER does not just create … He does much more.  To just address him as a verb-noun is seriously lacking theologically)
to Jesus the Christ, (You know, the SON of GOD … a man btw)
and to the Holy Spirit who dwells in our midst,
both now and forever. Amen.”

I found another version of it so here is yet another “inclusive” Magnificat which follows the same tune:

“My soul proclaims your greatness, O God,
and my spirit rejoices in you, my Savior.

For you have looked with favor upon your lowly servant, and from this day forward
all generations will call me blessed.
For you, the Almighty, have done great things for me, and holy is your Name.

Your mercy reaches from age to age
for those who fear you.

You have shown strength with your arm;
and have scattered the proud in their conceit;
you have deposed the mighty from their thrones and raised the lowly to high places.

You have filled the hungry with good things,
while you have sent the rich away empty.
You have come to the aid of Israel your servant, mindful of your mercy—
the promise you made to our ancestors –
to Sarah and Abraham (Here is that dang “Sarah” addition thing again.  The clincher in this one is that the woman is named FIRST … no subliminal agenda there at all!)
and their descendants forever.

You are probably wondering why I reddened the second person pronouns and possessive pronouns (you, your). I did so to illustrate the fact that the “translator” actually took the words out of context. If you recall, Mary is responding to the words of her cousin Elizabeth is who carrying John the Baptist. This would thus make all the “you’s” and “your’s” directed at Elizabeth since in the beginning, God Himself is not addressed. Mary could, for all we know, be magnifying Elizabeth. All for the sake of not using “He,” “Him,” and “His.”

Irony: they still refer to God as Lord which is a decidedly MALE noun for God. At least be consistent ladies. You may be off your rockers theologically and all that other stuff but at least be consistent.

Glory be to our Creator, (here’s that utilitarian theology again … just so they don’t say “Father.”  Priorities = out of line)to our Redeemer Jesus Christ (*rolls eyes again*), and to the Spirit of Life (well, at least He isn’t treated like an object)who dwells in our midst now and forever. Amen.”

Here is a MUCH better translation from the RSV Catholic Edition courtesy of EWTN:

“My soul magnifies the Lord,
and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior,
For he has regarded the low estate of his handmaiden (Feminists HATE that word apparently).
For behold, henceforth all generations will call me blessed;
For he who is mighty has done great things for me, and holy is his name. (All the male pronouns must be driving them crazy!!!!)
And his mercy is on those who fear him from generation to generation.
He has shown strength with his arm, he has scattered the proud in the imagination (I prefer the term “conceit” but whatever) of their hearts,
He has put down the mighty from their thrones, and exalted those of low degree;
He has filled the hungry with good things, and the rich he has sent empty away.”

(Now for the Glory Be as it ought to be said, written, and prayed)

“Glory be to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit, as it was in the beginning, is now and ever shall be, world without end/and will be forever. Amen.” (See how easy it was to just leave it all alone and NOT mess with it?)

The NAB translation courtesy of the USCCB:
“My soul proclaims the greatness of the Lord;
my spirit rejoices in God my savior.

For he has looked upon his handmaid’s lowliness; behold, from now on will all ages call me blessed.
The Mighty One has done great things for me, and holy is his name.

His mercy is from age to age to those who fear him.
He has shown might with his arm, dispersed the arrogant of mind and heart (I actually like this rendering of “conceit”).

He has thrown down the rulers from their thrones but lifted up the lowly.
The hungry he has filled with good things; the rich he has sent away empty.

He has helped Israel his servant, remembering his mercy,
according to his promise to our fathers, to Abraham (note the lack of Sarah … but that does not mean she has been excluded … duh!)and to his descendants forever.”

Now, you are probably all wondering why I reddened all the male pronouns. I did it to show just how horribly the “prayer renderers” slaughtered the text for the sake of being inclusive which in itself is redundant because the message of Christ is inclusive to all those who accept it in its fullness.

I don’t understand the necessity for inclusive language are some of us soooo dang sensitive that to refer to God as a male is shocking and oppressive? And don’t give me that Sophia stuff because some of those inclusive language people also love to refer to God as Sophia and constantly call Him and “She.”

Peoplez be worryin’ about the wrong thingz.

Non sequitur: it’s like the NON-ISSUE of women’s ordination … it’s NEVER going to happen. Even if a flock of pigs flew through the sky in figure eights while reciting Shakespeare it would NEVER happen. And I pray EVERY DAY for the conversion of those shmucks who want it so their eyes may be opened to the reality of Truth and the darkness that so clearly envelopes their minds in dissidence. God love them but COME ON!

Besides, if women ran the Church, the Church would be soooo messed up for one week a month. I mean like beyond PMS. Good Lord.

Well, I hope this entry was at least somewhat of a penance for you. I bet you are all anxious for next week! I will try to find a doozy of an inclusive reading. Heck, I think I still have that inclusive prayer service book I “took” from the library. lol Don’t worry, it was on the free rack. Thank God I didn’t burn either of these things. I was going to on Earth Day to one-up the pantheistic Catholycs who just so happened to have hated the Pro-Life group on campus in one way or another.

Have a great night everyone!

God love you all!


About Ms. Allie

I am a Catholic young woman who works as a Theology teacher at a Catholic high school in the Archdiocese of the Detroit. In Spring of 2015, I graduated with an MA in Theology with a concentration in Systematic Theology. My MA thesis was titled: "Mary as Woman of the Eucharist in the Theology of Pope Saint John Paul II." I also hold a BA in Theology (with a dabbling in Philosophy) and is a member of Theta Alpha Kappa (θΑΚ), the National Theology/Religious Studies Honor Society. Prayers are appreciated.
This entry was posted in Friday Penance of the Week, Random Fun-ness. Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to Allie’s Friday Penance Post of the Week! What have they done to the Magnificat?!?!

  1. katorikurant says:

    LOL…. man I wish I had kept that truly screwed up version of the Magnificat, by Joan Chitty chitty bang bang. I think I read it to you on your phone- it was much worse than the one that you posted.

    Will have to comment on the other posts later. They have gotten me thinking and I think you’ll appreciate the comments.

    Oh, and head over to katorikurant to see my attack plan. Yes, I has one. ^_^

  2. katorikurant says:

    Oh…oh God…I did a google search for that messed up magnificat. I found something much much much more retarded….

    She’s Anglican…but I think I understand now why its important what other Christian sects do in their spare time. You know, like set psychopathic womynz loose on the world…

  3. katorikurant says:

    Found it!!!

    Magnificat (From Life Ablaze: A Woman’s Novena) Translation by Mary David Callahan, OSB Benedictine Sisters of Erie:

    I sing your praises God with all my heart,
    and I rejoice in you O God of life,
    for you have looked upon my lowliness
    and who am I to merit your attention.

    I may henceforth regard myself as happy
    because you have done great things for me.
    And every generation gives assent
    for you are God and your name is holy.

    You give your grace anew in every age
    to those who live in reverence all their lives.
    Grace is your strengths,
    but you unmask all pride;
    you strip us bare of our self-conciet.

    Dethroned are those who hold authority,
    and poor and humble people you uphold.
    You live in great abundance to the hungry
    and send the rich away with empty hands.

    Your people Israel you have remembered,
    for mercy has been sent to all the faithful,
    just as you promised to those before us,
    to Abraham, to Sarah, their children forever.


What do you think?

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s