Laudetur Iesus Christus!
Nunc et in aeternum! Amen.
Memorial of Saint Maximilian Kolbe/Vigil of the Solemnity of the Assumption of the Blessed Virgin Mary
And people wonder why I can be so obsessive about checking my email. It’s because when I don’t check it and I allow it to pile up, I miss the really important stuff.
This was one of those times. And I was at my computer too doing some other research. I have a tendency to go on research binges where I find a topic that piques my fancy and I research the life out of it. It’s kinda how I have developed a mildly-encyclopedic knowledge of certain topics and why I can be rather good at Jeopardy!. It goes back to my nights spent reading encyclopedias before bed when I was a little kid (no joke). I would fall asleep with the large books on my bed. I moved around a lot in my sleep back then so inevitably one or more of those books (I would have several on my bed at a time sometimes) would fall out of my bed to the floor with a BOOM! My parents would be awoken by the noise thinking someone was trying to get into the house but after having investigated everything would come to my room and find me sound asleep with a few encyclopedias on the floor. While other girls were getting dolls and such for Christmas and birthdays, I got encyclopedias and the like and I loved it!
Anywho, I am putzing on Aloysius when I notice that I have stuff in my inbox, mostly my daily news emails I get from various places both church-y and worldly. Once I get through those, I notice something from the Seminary with the subject line: “Notification of acceptance into MA Theology”!
BSOJ (Blue Screen of Joy … blue for Our Lady)
I look at the email again. They say that I have been accepted and to anticipate an official hard copy of my acceptance in the mail within a week which will help me prep for classes.
This is kinda bittersweet because I want more than anything to take classes this Fall but I am thinking a January start will be better for me on many levels. Of course, “if you want to make God laugh, tell Him your plans.” I make Him laugh a lot apparently. I put it all in His hands through the intercession of Our Lady.
KJHSDFJKHAKTHWEIHJGKLASHTRHJSDFJHKJAWERTHSDFJBREJKTHWETJKBDNAL;IETU93973957KFOSDJFN03U (my postmodern expressionist way of conveying my joyness)
I made it into grad school. I really made it. I did it. You have no idea what this means to me.
Hard to believe really. A year ago around now, I was getting ready to enter the convent. Grad school was the last thing on my mind. It was there but it wasn’t very close to the head of the queue. I was wondering if I had enough pairs of nude-colored nylons and how short I had to get my hair cut so that I would still appear female (Thank Gawd I have an excellent stylist whom I have known for years).
Fast forward a year later and here I am. Had I stayed in the convent, I would have just entered novitiate this past Friday (I think it was Friday or Saturday). I would have gotten my habit, my religious name (Sister Allison Michael Marie), and would be beginning a new chapter in my discernment of religious life.
God had other plans. Sometimes they hurt … like Purgatory.
I will be the first to admit that there have been times when I have wondered if I made the right decision. Getting this email is confirmation for me. Not that I needed it but it’s always nice. There have been times when I wanted to take advantage of what the minister provincial said to me, “Allison, the door is always open if you want to come back.”
But I have come to the realization over the past few months that if He wanted me there, He would have kept me there. I was there for the time I needed to be there. No matter how painful leaving was, it had to be done because it was part of the greater plan that the Lord has for me even if I do not understand that now or for years to come.
Now, I have one hurdle that is staring me down. That blasted license. Imma do it. Nothing is in my way now. Nothing else can weigh on me now. Everything else is in place for grad school to happen.
When I called the Seminary yesterday to confirm that my second recommendation had arrived, I told the woman that I was probably going to wait until Winter term to start studies. She said, “Remember, you can register for classes up until the first week of classes.” I looked up and said in my heart, “If You want it, make it happen, give me the grace, I can’t do it on my own.”
So that’s what I am doing. Though I am planning on waiting until Winter for the reasons I think I mentioned in my last post or so. I don’t want to stress myself out too much. God knows I have enough of that from other places.
I am just so happy right now. Even I don’t start until January, Imma get into a routine of reading some heavy Theology every day for x amount of time. I might even crack the binding on my Primer of Ecclesiastical Latin book that has been staring at me looking all abandoned and unloved for so long. I need to prepare myself for some major neuron popping.
Oh, and something hit me this morning at Mass. I have been kinda shooting the merde about on what topics would be good to do a thesis. Then … it came to me. Our Lady. If I can, I would LOVE to do a thesis on a Mariological topic. Mariology has always been a passion of mine. I love Our Lady and I love learning more about her. She is, after all, our greatest role model after Christ (who has the whole divinity thing added to His infinite awesome-ness) what with her being the perfect human being par excellence. And she has been a major player in getting me to where I am now and where I am going so doing my thesis on her would be a labor of love and an act of thanksgiving from one of her more brainy/nerdy children.
I am so happy. “Happy” doesn’t even begin to describe it. I just have to keep going. Keep trusting in the Lord’s Providence and stick to my guns and never lose hope no matter how bleak things may get.
Did I mention that tomorrow is the Solemnity of the Assumption of the Blessed Virgin Mary? No, well, it is. And it’s a HOLY DAY OF OBLIGATION for all persons who wish to call themselves Catholics. You can go to a Vigil Mass tonight or go during the day tomorrow. But GO TO MASS. No excuses outside of extenuating circumstances like serious illness or things over which you have no real control (tiredness and laziness ain’t two of ’em.).
Besides, IT’S A MARIAN FEAST DAY! And a major one to boot. Tomorrow is the day we commemorate Mary’s bodily Assumption into Heaven (not Ascension … that was Christ, He’s God, He did it of His own power. Mary was taken up by God Himself. Big dif.) after her earthly mission was complete. Mary DID NOT DIE. We got into a debate about that on Facebook last night. How can she who was conceived without stain of even original sin suffer death which itself is a consequence of sin entering the world? Yeah, theo-logically it don’t make sense to me either. Glad y’all agree with meh.
Tomorrow (all right, tonight too), we will be able to joyfully sing out, “Assumpta est Maria in caelum et gaudent angeli!” Mary is assumed into heaven and the angels rejoice!
Have a wonderful evening!
And take a guess what “Part Two” is going to be. Hopefully that will be coming soon but on God’s time. Not mine. He will provide.